Kristen Doute

Kristen opens up about this painful time with Tom, her friends criticizing her relationship and new girl Ariana.

on Nov 25, 20130

To be honest with you guys, I had a really hard time with this episode and didn't watch it in it's entirety.

Tom and I were mending the wounds. We were both working on empathy and focusing on our blissful present, rather than the painful past. He had accepted that I was still hurt and I realized I had to stop punishing him in order for us to move forward and be happy. Being a b---- was just my defense mechanism for all of the hurt I had building up inside for so long. I don't even think I was actually angry -- just devastated.

I wanted to ignore the rumors watching my friends knock my relationship and having to relive that was too intense.

Ariana is a home wrecking w---- and doesn't deserve to be spoken of.

55 comments
nessaedith
nessaedith

Whether Arianna was or was not involved with Tom doesn't vindicate your actions. However unfortunate to be going through this with a national audience judging your every move, please remember to respect yourself. I can't imagine that you would say something like that about another woman without any proof of her crossing the line with him. Unless there is something you know that we don't, in that case, wait for us to catch up on the show, and I'm sure the viewers will be right behind you.

bigtalon
bigtalon

Tom, Kristen is going to be too high maintenance for a lifelong relationship.  Life is too short for all of this drama.  Date Ariana....less stress, more fun and seems more mentally stable.  Kristen, you need counseling and a new boyfriend.  Tom causes you too much stress...whether warranted or not, time to move on. 

Juliana444
Juliana444

I totally understand how you are feeling, if Tom doesnt drop his 'friend' Ariana then drop him as he shouldnt be doing anything that makes you feel more insecure, its not fair on you and you are trying to build trust back into your relationship, she doesnt care about you two and I wouldnt trust her around him at all, you have the love for him and he should appreciate that , dont put up with this crap hun xxx

Stephanie_in_WA
Stephanie_in_WA

For you to say, "Ariana is a home wrecking w---- and doesn't deserve to be spoken of" is so immature! You have NO PROOF that she ever had any relations with Tom other than your deranged, immature, crazy mind and its delusional accusations. I hope she sues you for libel! 

 

And just so you know, being so insecure, immature, obsessed and jealous is not an attractive look and only makes you appear "ugly."

 

P.S. So you realize how pathetic you appear? How are you not embarrassed and that you obviously (after how many months from taping - ???) are still acting a fool?! You need to grow up. If you were my daughter, I would be embarrassed and ashamed of you and your behavior and would get you into counseling ASAP! 

i.indie
i.indie

It's official - you truly do WANT to be miserable.  People suffer through horrific circumstances every day of the year and deal with them remarkably better than you do over a boyfriend cheating.  That's it - he cheated on you and lied about it.  No one died, no one lost their children, money, career, got cancer, etc.  Someone cheating on you is NOT the end of the world no matter how much you all try to make it be.  Either you accept, forgive and move on or you don't. It's really not more complicated than that. And to try to make it so means you literally have nothing important going on in your life.

 

Happiness is a CHOICE.  Happiness is NOT a specific set of circumstances.  Ask anyone. You are completely responsible for making yourself either happy or unhappy.  Blaming anyone else for your unhappiness is victimhood at the highest.  Get over yourself and start to be the "strong" gal you claim to be.

hheston
hheston

Kristen - Seriously will you stop saying, My BOYFRIEND, MY BOYFRIEND to everyone.  Your friends and coworkers know his name and quite honestly it makes you look like a teenager.  He is not your possession, people can have their own thoughts and feelings and you can't control everyone's opinion by announcing he's your BOYFRIEND all over the place.

singlewife
singlewife

A homewrecker?  You don't have a home, you have a miniature apartment with IKEA furniture. 

fell
fell

Kristen, whose  home did she wreck? I think you are one of those women (hard for me to use that word with you), who get jealous when their boyfriend has a friend who is female. Get over yourself, grow up and move on. 

tracey.connors.56
tracey.connors.56

I can't believe the haters in here. These people are so shallow and only give thought to the words they hear, never wondering where they are coming from. Their minds are too small to give deeper thought to where actions/attitudes come from. Most of these people are just talking out of their asses. Ignore the bs. It's your life. Follow your heart and stay true to yourself. And never apologize for being you!

KChousewife13
KChousewife13

Kristen, you're a total Debbie Downer. Every time I see you on tv you look like someone just kicked your puppy. You're constantly whining about something, usually Tom, and it really looks like you are just a miserable, miserable person. 

 

Tom cheated and YOU CHOSE to stay with him. You didn't have to. No one forced you. You don't get a medal for it and certainly don't get a free pass to be a huge B either. What he did was wrong. He knows that and so does everyone else. But if you make the choice to stay with someone that has cheated on you then you're also making the choice to move forward. If you can't then you should do you both a favor and break up with him . Constantly punishing him and not moving on and moving forward is so counterproductive. 

 

As far as Ariana goes, stop being a mean girl! Have enough confidence and self respect to leave her alone and focus on yourself and your own relationship

WilliamSue
WilliamSue

Kristen, please take my advice and seek professional counseling.  Maybe you can work out all your insecurities about yourself and come out a better and stronger person.  I'm begging you....it's getting hard to watch you on tv.  Your personality is grating. 

Toeknee
Toeknee

Sighs....oh you had something important to say

Cards
Cards

What a BS Blog. "Ariana is a homewrecking w- - - - who doesn't deserve to be spoken of"? Then don't speak of her. Otherwise, explain, you're on a tv show. 

suzcurt
suzcurt

I am not a fan but I have to say that generally speaking when someone cheats the problem usually isn't the other person, the problem is the two people in the relationship.  There is something not right in your relationship, and he strayed as a result.  Not saying he is right but I think you need to look a little deeper at the relationship, at thirty years old is this really the life you want?

sugarcoatnsmoke
sugarcoatnsmoke

How does it feel to have your friends turn on you like you turned on Stassi last year? You are incredibly insecure and it makes you so unattractive. I hate to say it, but I don't really blame Tom for seeking intimacy elsewhere. Last season you got angry at him because you had a shoot with a girl he slept with years before he even met you. I think you are abusive to him and I don't know why he takes it. There's just something about you that is really gross and I really believe it's your attitude. 

jmbgmom
jmbgmom

Sorry Kristen, but you are a BI__H!! When a guy cheats on you, you either forgive him and forget about it (if you are desperate), you don't rake him over the coals over and over and especially in front of his friends. That is not the way a real woman acts. You are a miserable human being who enjoys making Tom look and feel like and idiot. You were like that even before he cheated on you!! You try to act like his mother. You take tips from Stassi (who isn't that bright). You are 30 yrs old, which you love to point out, you are still working at Sur, as a glorified waitress. Go out and get a real job. Didn't you go to college? If so what did you study, how to torment men and how to be a rotten friend and employee? I bet your parents are not proud at all of you. If you were my daughter, I would be ashaned of you, for sure.

Picket@fence
Picket@fence

Prayers and good wishes for peace coming your way. ;o)

BravoFan363
BravoFan363

Don't listen to the haters.  You seem like a sweet girl.  The problem with sharing your relationship with friends is then they feel entitled to tell you how to handle your life.  Mostly advice driven by jealousy.  Stassi is nobody's friend and obviously no relationship expert.  You and Katie seem like you have a real friendship.  Nurture that and ignore that catty haters.

shysharon
shysharon

watch yourself on film, when you were Lisa, she needed to say her peace when you returned...you wanted to talk over her...you couldn't wait to get your 2 cents in! It's best to SAY NOTHING! It's what you got suspended for, and it's exactly what you did the minute you returned! Some people don't want to hear from you! Not trying to be mean, just trying to help!

RoseWilde
RoseWilde

It seems like LA is kicking your butt.

Blue_26
Blue_26

And yet you spoke of her.

shelly3630@gmail.com
shelly3630@gmail.com

Okay I am not a fan of yours, the way you are treating Tom, ya he messed up, but, you either move on or don't making him and yourself miserable is just wrong. But, you putting up with these so called friends, is just crazy, if you are really trying to work it out with Tom, you need to get rid of these horrible children that will not be happy until, you do what they want, so, the way it looks, either have your own life or have the life they want you to have? And by the way it looks, their lives suck! Who is it for them to try and find out anything about your man, unless they are looking for something so that they can, and they want to, so they can say "see, i told you, he is bad, I told you, you should of left, I told you, I was right, you should of listen to me, I was right". That is all they are looking for, they are not looking out for you, they don't care, they are all looking for anything, anything Tom is doing so they can toss it in your face so they can, smile that cocky smile and at the same time pat you on the back "oh I'm so sorry" and laughing at you the whole time. I have never seen a bunch of girls, push, and push and look for something wrong in my life, unless one of them wanted him themselves!!

Cindy81
Cindy81

Kristen you have done nothing wrong.  I don't understand why everyone is attacking you?1?!  any girl would act the same way in the same situation.  Stassi is a hypocrite how can she judge your relationship when her's is so messed up with Jax.  At least your not talking about other men while trying to mend things with Tom

 

Katie just seems to say everythitng that Stassi says

 

they are HORRIBLE friends...you deserve so much better

 

Schena's an idiot too...she will just say anytihng to get airtime..she need to go fix her tooth then talk

 

As for the coffee and old cigarette comment that was so immature..who is that girl anyway...have she looked in the mirror?!?!

 

Lisa obviously has her favorites...dont let her get to you...just do your job and go home, in the end sh is your boss

 

 

emcee
emcee

Kristen, you're pretty lucky your friends are standing by you through such a hard time in your life, don't test their patience too much, keep em close. Sounds like the Ariana thing is going to go down a really dark road, I don't like the sound of it. The way she spoke about you to Scheana was just disgusting, I don't consider that to be a "cool" girl thing to do at all. 

bjunebug28
bjunebug28

Stop blaming Ariana for what Tom did to you!  Girls so easily turn on each other when it was the man who made you a promise and broke it.  Assuming Ariana did hook up with Tom, she is not your friend and owes you nothing.  That is not to say that what she did, if she did it, is okay.  It's not.  Karma will take care of her.  But you need to be concerned with getting rid of the one who betrayed you, and having enough self respect to do so.  Staying with him and torturing him is not doing either one of you any good.

AmusedSomuch
AmusedSomuch

Kristen I applaud you for giving iyour relationship a shot and walking away from a table of people who are not your friends. Friends support your choices, whatever they may be and celebrate your success or pick you up if you fail but no matter what they recognize it's your life. It takes courage and you showed it - walk away from the negatives - good girl

VikkiP
VikkiP

And how is Ariana a home wrecker?

cars121
cars121

REALITY CHECK:  In one breath you profess how your LIFE, friends, etc. are all at SUR.  In another breath you say you don't want to go back there.  At 30+ years old, can you not connect the dots yet? OMG!

River69
River69

Kristen,  

 

Perhaps you're insecure for a reason.  Tom does not appear to be the type of man who is ready for a serious relationship; however, Jax doesn't appear to be ready either.  I don't know whether the problem is that models-bartenders are  too self-absorbed, immature for a commitment.  The insecurity of the job/s creates this psychological problem. It may be that, after his modeling career is over, and he bar tends in a different environment, he will be better able to achieve maturity and commit.   

SuzanLee
SuzanLee

Kristen,

I know you are hurt by Tom cheating on you in Vegas and I felt like you were finally ready to give the relationship another chance.  Tom clearly cares for you and is making an honest effort to rectify his mistake. I felt so bad for you being attacked by your "friends" at lunch. Stassi is NOT your friend!  In fact, she is not loyal to anyone including you, Jax, Katie and Scheana.  Stassi is only out for herself and seems to relish other people's misery.  Do yourself a favor and dump these toxic "friends" and just focus on your own happiness.

viewer22
viewer22

I am not your friend, and I am sick of hearing about you and Tom. Can't imagine how sick of it your friends are!!!

MissLuvRealityTV
MissLuvRealityTV

Hang in there Kristen. Stassi needs to worry about her relationship with Wack Jax. I don't even know what to say about Katie.

Crazyhockeymom
Crazyhockeymom

seriously...how old are all of you.  I've never seen such a bunch of mean girls in my life....You were miserable last year and even more so this year....your gonna waste year of your life away and wake up 15 years from now still miserable...life is to short to me so miserable..wake up before it's too late...

zookeeper93
zookeeper93

Your maturity is stunted at age 11. No offense to 11 year olds. 

wiscfan
wiscfan

Why are all you girls so insecure?  Where is your self-esteem?  You may look beautiful on the outside, but wow, not on the inside.

nvt
nvt

You are creating what you fear most. If you don't stop obsessing about every female that Tom comes into contact with you are going to send him running for his life. LITERALLY !

murphy1
murphy1

You are 30 years old.....start acting your age.

Stephanie_in_WA
Stephanie_in_WA

Oh please! Stop being so jealous and insecure -- it's not very attractive. 

MaureenHobbs
MaureenHobbs

 @tracey.connors.56 you obviously don't watch the show.  She is an idiot.  All of these comments should giver her a hint.  When 100 people tell you your doing something wrong, you are doing something wrong.  Not being shallow, just truthful.  She made the choice to stay with him and now all she does is complain.  They are a horrible couple and should not be together.  She is way too immature.  

kellyl0718
kellyl0718

 @KChousewife13

 I'd be a Debbie downer if I had to live her miserable life too! also, don't hate a girl for this whining bout her man either.  uve obviously neva been cheated on.  it's hard! she'll fig out it out tho.  She should dump him just for being prettier than her.  I don't think she's being a mean girl re Arianna. It's pretty clear that tom n her got something going on and I think her gut is right and she should listen to it.  When a man cheats on a woman, the last place he should be is giggling with another girl while their shopping...  Tom says all he does is "goof off" with Arianna but it sounds like a 10 yr. old boy with a mad crush on a 14 yr. old hottie.  Right? im sorry but he IS a chick. Kristen: get rid of him, he is a joke!

Sonc
Sonc

 @suzcurt Since the show began and Kristen and Tom were introduced, I thought there was something "off" about the two of them as a couple. Tom appeared to be a hip, carefree, artistic type whereas Kristen was simply type-a.

jmbgmom
jmbgmom

 @BravoFan363 Is that what you see when you watch Kristen on TV? If so you need glasses!

nvt
nvt

 @AmusedSomuch

 She didn't walk away Stassi told her to. She looked like a bad 5 year old leaving, head down lip out. Grow up

Cindy81
Cindy81

then you probably don't have any friends...

debikk
debikk

 @Crazyhockeymom If you and Tom are serious about saving your relationship you need to leave Sur...

debikk
debikk

 @wiscfan Because all they know is how to be superficial. They aren't real... Stassi is the worst!